Yes…it is true. We have come to a place where inflatable men are now inhabiting my blog like a gnome pushing travel deals on television. I am not proud…nor giddy. What I am is perplexed. You see, I was recently speaking with a female colleague who shared how hard it has been to find a “decent guy.” I figured why don’t I take a look into this issue since we have all been discussing what men and women want.
I can look around and see for myself that the quality members of my gender are few and far between. I am beginning to think that the Normal Males in our world are actually a secret society whose mantra is,
“Keep the dumb men in the public eye and there will be more opportunity for us!”
This group, of which I am waiting for my membership card, resides in the shadows of our communities. Comes out in spurts and pounces on opportunities to trump the stereotypical meat head, hick, beer guzzling, proponent of continued male “domination” guy that proliferates our airwaves, television sets, and fast food joints. Yes, the Normal Males of the world understand that the bar has been set quite low and the daily struggle is to avoid complacency. It can be very easy to look and sound better than the average bear. You might even say that Normal Males can do it half asleep. So what is the problem? Why could this be bad for the evolved male? Well, it is quite simple…there are more of them then there are of us!! Our numbers our dwindling faster than Teabagger Sarah Palin’s credibility on FOX. We are losing out to a legion of men dedicated to colonial days and chew. We are quickly becoming a collective gender that skips out of college, grooming, care for others, and dynamic and flexible personalities.
We are the poster children for “Have it Your Way!”
If you don’t believe me you should read The New Math on Campus story from the New York Times. Women are looking for us in earnest and coming up donuts. They cannot catch a break and the danger for the Normal Males is that when there is an actual siting…we tend to scare women off because they think that we just might be too good to be true, a farce, a con, when in fact we are decent men.
We are not perfect. We are not completely evolved for this century…just yet. We still find ourselves slipping up (Dating Games Men Play article) and maybe that is because we are so used to being clumped together with the out-of-date man y’all think is Normal.
We understand that you are looking for your soul mates. We are too! We want to love and care for you. We want to grow old and discover new and wonderful things about each other. We understand that we struggle in marketing our message. We absolutely need to improve our elevator pitch and we need to be more proactive in letting you know that we are the way we are because we care about ourselves first and ourselves in relationship second.
Please do not take this openness as bravado or ignorance. We have watched Oprah and HGTV all the while taking mental notes for future uses that will excite and surprise you. We are working hard to recruit other Normal Males who will vouch for us. We understand that you will judge us on the friends we keep and believe me we are cleaning house. We understand that the responsibility falls on us to inform the coming generations of boys. We want them believing in a world that has depth, conversation, good wine, football, and the arts.
What we need, to increase your odds and our population, is a little publicity from all of the kind and wonderful women reading this post today. Applaud the men that demonstrate multiple facets of gender evolution (i.e. good hygiene, care for others, good conversationalists and listeners etc.) and please support us when we exercise our natural tendencies to be and act like a man (i.e. watch sports while wearing shirts with holes, occasional belching, and odd emanating odors).
We promise to clean up, act up, and be the kind of man that makes us both proud. And, when you catch us staring into a mirror just know that we want to look good for you and more importantly for ourselves and our health.
Now if that darn mail carrier could just hurry up and bring me my membership card!